Sunday, November 27, 2005
GOODBYE, LEMMY!
Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving. We went to NY for the holiday to visit relatives. The visit went well, but when we got back, we found out that our pet iguana, Lemmy, had passed away. She was old (about 14 years old - iguanas live about the same as a dog or a cat), so it wasn't a complete surprise. But it was just weird to find her dead.
Frankly, Lemmy was just as affectionate and loved attention as much as a dog or a cat would. When we first got her back in 1992, she was one of about 20 baby iguanas in a terrarium, and she was jumping over all the rest of them to get to me. Needless to say, it was obvious which one I picked. Back then, she was about a month old and as big as your finger. When she died, she was over four feet long from head to tail. She was always a good natured pet, and loved to be petted. She was a part of our lives for a lot of years and definitely one of the family.
I had absolutely no idea what to do with her body (you can't just bury a four foot lizard in the back yard). So I called a local vetrinary hospital and they said they'd bury her in an animal burial ground for $50. I had no idea what else do to, so we took a cab down to the vet's office, carrying Lemmy in a bag.
It's been slowly sinking in all day. It's just so weird not to have her around. She was a part of our lives for so many years. We're both pretty down about it. To check out a picture of her, just go to the first page of Laura's website.
Lemmy will be missed.
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
RIGHT HOUSE Makes Bestsellers List!
I almost forgot to mention it. The first week the chapbook RIGHT HOUSE ON THE LEFT came out (featuring my story, "The Blood-Splattered Mirror Ball"), it made SHOCKLINES.COM's bestseller's list!! I was shocked. Seems the book is selling pretty well. For those of you who have bought it already - thanks for the support - and I hope you dig all three stories: by me, Mark McLaughlin and Steve Vernon. If you haven't gotten it yet - what are you waiting for? At only $5 a pop, it's a steal, and with free postage through Shocklines.com, it comes out to even cheaper. And it makes a great stocking stuffer for the holidays! Ho Ho Ho!
Monday, November 21, 2005
MASTERS OF HORROR!
I've been a little behind in reviewing the new Showtime series MASTERS OF HORROR here. So I figured I'd make up for that. So here are reviews of the first four episodes.
EPISODE ONE: INCIDENT ON AND OFF A MOUNTAIN ROAD (Directed by Don Coscarelli, based on a story by Joe R. Lansdale)
I dug the first episode of MASTERS OF HORROR. Then again, I'm a huge Lansdale fan, and Mr. Coscarelli (who directed the PHANTASM movies as well as the Lansdale adaptation BUBBA HO-TEP, too) ain't too shabby either.
The plot is basic. A woman's car breaks down on a mountain road. While looking for help she comes across a deformed murderer who has a collection of corpses in his ramshackle house. The killer also has a thing for drilling eyeballs. The woman does everything she can to stay one step ahead of him and avoid becoming his next victim, drawing on the training pounded into her by her abusive husband, who was also a survivalist.
I liked this episode, but I do think that Mr. C could have chosen a better Lansdale story. "Incident On and Off a Mountain Road" isn't a bad story, especially the whole women-empowerment message, but I think some people unfamiliar with his work will just think it's kinda similar to stuff like Texas Chainsaw (and the first appearance of Moonface in the hat almost looked like the dude from Jeepers Creepers! - not to mention the whole "eye" mutilation thing - even if Lansdale's story did come first). I would have been a lot more psyched if the Lansdale episode had been based on "The Night They Missed the Horror Show" or "By Bizarre Hands."
A minor quibble, though. On the whole, a solid, suspenseful episode. With pretty much non-stop tension and action. The show looked great and seemed like a nice way to start the series. All they need to do now is have episodes based on Jack Ketchum ("The Box" perhaps..) and Ed Lee ("Mr. Torso" anyone?) and I'd be in horror heaven!
MASTERS OF HORROR is easily the most anticipated, and potentially most amazing horror anthology show in years. Because the directors and writers involved are all first-rate. And this first episode leaving me wanting more...
EPISODE TWO: DREAMS IN THE WITCH-HOUSE (Directed by Stuart Gordon, based on a story by H.P. Lovecraft)
I thought "Dreams in the Witch House" was good, but like RE-ANIMATOR (which Gordon also directed, and which I absolutely love), I wonder how faithful Gordon's short film is to Lovecraft's original story. I've gotta go back and read the story now. Gordon is well-known for taking "liberties" with Lovecraft, and while I enjoy most of what Gordon has done that has been Lovecraft-inspired, I wonder what hardcore Lovecraft fans think of his work. For example, I think that any "sexual content" alone would make ol' H.P. roll over in his grave
This time around we get a story about a college student who moves into a weird boarding house. His neighbors include a single mother and an old man who bangs his head against the floor while he prays all night long. The student finds out that his room is some kind of portal into another dimension where a witch (a previous inhabitant of the house, and a child-killer) waits to come back into our world. Featuring the witch's familiar, a rat with a human face, who seems like comic relief in some scenes.
I liked the first episode a little better, but "Witch House" was a fun episode. Although it doesn't come anywhere near the genius of RE-ANIMATOR.
EPISODE THREE: DANCE OF THE DEAD (Directed by Tobe Hooper, Teleplay by Richard Christian Matheson, based on a story by his father, Richard Matheson. Starring Robert "Freddy" Englund
I liked this episode a lot. It had flaws, but it did exactly what I wanted from MASTERS OF HORROR - it pushed the envelope, it seemed experimental in its look and the way it told the story, and all in all it was just riveting. As it started out, the viewer was kind of confused what was going on, but if you kept you watching, all questions were eventually answered. The writing was solid, and Tobe Hooper did a great job directing.
In a post-plague-stricken America, gangs go around taking taking syringes full of people's blood by force, and reanimated corpses are forced to dance in night clubs in front of awe-struck audiences, as the "dance of the dead" becomes a new form of entertainment. A sheltered girl whose mother has tried to protect her from this new world, goes out for a night on the town with her new biker boyfriend, and gets to see the ugliness around her up close. With Robert Englund as the MC.
This episode actually seemed to push the envelope and keep us guessing. Look, this series is on Showtime, without the restrictions of network TV. I want this show to fuck with my head!!
EPISODE FOUR: JENIFER (Directed by Dario Argento, based on a story by Bruce Jones)
This episode was so fucking twisted that I really loved it. Steven Weber (who also wrote the screenplay, based on a short story by comic-book writer Bruce Jones - whose run writing for THE HULK was a favorite of mine - though I'd never heard of his story "Jenifer" before), plays a cop who saves a girl from being killed. The thing is, she has a totally hot bod, but a hideous monster face. Somehow, he becomes obsessed with saving her, and becomes her lover. Early on they think she might be retarded because she can't speak, and she has very disturbing eating habits (she starts with a cat and works her way up the food chain), but it's clear she's some kind of weird succubus creature who ruins men's lives.
Weber does a good job, and the whole tone of the story is just fucked up. This is easily the best thing Argento has directed in years, and easily my favorite episode so far.
My verdict so far: this show is getting better as it goes along, and while it started out kind of hit or miss, at least it's a chance to see major horror directors adapting real horror stories (not from the imagination of Hollywood hacks, but real horror writers). Upcoming episodes will feature such talents as Mick Garris, John Landis and Takashi Miike (!!). I'm having fun with this show and look forward to it every weekend. The best genre show of the season isn't on network TV this season. It's on Showtime.
Well, that takes me up to date on the state of genre TV shows. For everyone reading, have a great Thanksgiving, and I'll be posting more after the holiday.
Until then, INFERNALLY YOURS,
LLS
TV ROUND-UP!
Well, it's time to play catch-up. I'm going to review the first four episodes of the new Showtime show MASTERS OF HORROR today, but first, here's an update on some of the genre shows on network TV:
1) INVASION - it's not a horrible show, and I like the actors, but it moves so slow that I fall asleep at some point every time I watch it. I decided I could do better things with the hour - like write.
2) NIGHT STALKER - for some reason I kept watching it. Maybe out of some misguided idea that I was "monitoring" how bad it was compared to the original series. The things is, there really was no point in my tuning in. It never got good enough to redeem itself and frankly, it was just a waste of time. Of course, now there's no choice in the matter. ABC canceled it right around the time I decided to stop watching. I actually haven't been this happy about a show cancellation in a long time. I actually stopped watching at just the right time, because the last episode that aired as the first episode of a two-part story (which I didn't watch). The second part will never air. Good riddance.The only purpose the show had at all was getting the original series finally released on DVD, and for that I'm grateful!
Two more genre shows off my list.
So far, the ones I've stuck with are SURFACE, which has a lot of flaws, but the main thing keeping me watching is I want to know what the link is between the sea monsters, the "secret place" where that one guy's brother is contacting him from (someone at a UFO convention in an early episode mentioned a city beneath the sea - sounded crazy then, but now seems like a plot device), and any kind of alien conspiracy thing. For some reason, I really want to see how all these things tie together.
Lake Bell is great as the scientist Daughtery (she was formerly a lawyer on BOSTON LEGAL and I liked her a lot there, too). And the trucker guy, Rich, is okay. The one storyline I'm growing to despise is the kid with his cute alien pet - and I really wish Nimrod would eat his fuckin master at this point. But it's not bad enough to stop me watching.
It's not a great show, and I'm really not 100% sure why I keep giving it chances, but I'm compelled to keep watching it (so far).
I'm also still watching THRESHOLD, which has its ups and downs, but which has still kept my interest so far. They just changed its time slot from Fridays at 9pm to Tuesdays at 10pm. No idea if this will help or not, but I'll keep watching.
Oh, and LOST is still my favorite show on network TV. Some people have said that it's gotten a little slow lately, too, but I'm totally sucked in, especially the new storyline about the other people on the island (the "tailies" from the tail of the plane) and how they've survived too. The original genre hit is still the best.
That's about it. Kind of disappointing actually, considering how many new genre shows popped up all at once this season.
Monday, November 07, 2005
NOT MUCH NEW
Well, I started my new job this week, and so far it's going pretty well. I have high hopes for this one. Not much in the way of other news, though. It's been a pretty quiet week otherwise. I'll write more here when there's stuff to talk about.
Later.
